Bonus 3 (Life) - To The Arcade
Total Carnage (Xbox 360)
Beaten on the Xbox One. This is part of Midway Arcade Origins, an Xbox 360 compilation that’s backwards compatible on the Xbox One.
If you’re not familiar with this game, take Smash TV, turn everything up to the highest level, then break the dial. It is near impossible to beat this legitimately so thank goodness for unlimited credits. Even then, you can beat the game and still not get the real ending by capturing General Akboob and you can completely get all that done and still not get the keys necessary to enter the Pleasure Domes. This is a damn fun game, mind you, but you have to be willing to accept a sensory overload here.
GAME BEATEN
Group 2 (Video Game Genres) - Platformer
Neon Beats (PC)
I had a hard time deciding if this was a platformer or a music game. Considering I’m doing more jumping and not necessarily doing anything to a beat, I’m opting for platformer.
I’m not really a fan of the masochistic platformer as I’ve lost my reflexes for that sort of thing a long time ago. Still, this kinda reminds me of Sound Shapes in that the platforming adheres to a sort of rhythm with some things appearing and turning based on a beat. It’s fine for what it is but it is also short, clocking in at 3 levels if you don’'t count the tutorial. At least it’s free.
GAME BEATEN
Group 7 (Grouvee & Other Databases) - Game Connected with Movie
World War Z (PC)
Did you want Left 4 Dead with a license? This is essentially that game minus any relation to the movie save for the zombie piles. It works fine as a shooter but you’re going to feel no connection with the characters or scenarios and the leveling system feels hollow. It’ll work in a pinch if you ever get tired of either Left 4 Dead game.
That’s at least one game done in all 13 groups. Getting closer to that Mode 2 Easy goal
Group 8 (Developer/Publisher) - Spain, Portugal, or Italy
A Hole New World (Switch)
It was released about 2 years ago on PC and even though I have it on there, i decided to buy it and beat it on Switch. Nintendo’s hybrid system has that effect on me where I’ll have no issue double dipping
This is a decidedly retro game from the graphics to the soundtrack (which you can toggle from NES and SNES styles). Even the difficulty is up there with some of the more frustrating NES titles as evidenced by the final level and duo of bosses which made me curse loudly and threaten to chuck controllers. It is a good game overall and the addition of quality of life settings like autosaving and generous checkpoints along with some persistence is nice but the lack of bottomless pits will throw you for a loop the first time you encounter it. Worth checking out.
Group 5 (Pile of Shame) - Game from 2013
Ikachan (Nintendo 3DS)
The game originally came out in 2000 but the 3DS version hit in 2013. I bought and beat the game there so…
To be honest, the game is pointless. By that I mean there’s a story, kind of, but there’s also no a sort of calm to the game’s pacing. You can level up but the cap is at 5 and you only need to level up to get enough hearts to withstand the Flappy Bird style swimming. It is fun but the game is free on the PC so unless you need to have it on the go with you, just play it on PC. Be warned the game may take an hour max to complete so it’ll also qualify for “You can finish it in a day.”
Group 2 (Video Game Genres) - Open World
Rage 2 (PC)
I got the first game via a bundle but I never played it. Since I was told that I wouldn’t need to experience the first game to understand this one, I picked it up and gave it a shot.
The good news is that the gameplay is solid. You can’t take many shots before dying so most of your gunfights are going to be spent peppering enemies with lead then running around to find more ammo before repeating the process. The gunplay is and the enemy AI is fun to fight against while the powers you obtain make things more interesting. Vehicular combat is nice and the fact that you aren’t forced to explore and obtain everything before going after the final boss is an interesting design choice.
The problem specifically with the PC version is that it is buggy. Parts of the conversation drop without warning so unless you’ve got subtitles on, you may miss parts of the story. Some sound effects are missing and saving before the final fight is a bad idea since the game crashes.
It is still a game worth checking out but wait for a bunch of patches and a discount before doing so.
Group 9 (The Wheel of Time) - Medieval
A Plague Tale: Innocence (PC)
This was fantastic. I was intrigued by the early trailers for the game as they made rats the most terrifying thing out there and seeing the swarms in motion in the final product was rather unnerving. The stealth elements were simple but very well done and the puzzle elements were fun to figure out, even if they resulted in some grizzly deaths. The gameplay time was spot on, the side characters were fun to hang out with, and the whole story was interesting from beginning to end, even if things did get strange by that point.
About the only thing I wasn’t a fan of was your little brother. yes, he is supposed to be only 5 years old but there are times where he would do something stupid that I wouldn’t have minded if he was captured. Other than that, well worth playing.
Bonus Group 1 (Games by Regions/Language) - Slavic country or Hungary
Guns’N’Stories: Bulletproof (PSVR)
A Wild West game developed by a small team in Croatia.
There’s nothing wrong with a shooting gallery game in VR. Heck, this one is kinda neat only because it starts to throw in odd things in the middle of a firefight or just out of the intended era. However, everything about this is a mess. the levels go on for far too long, the jokes are terrible and borderline offensive, the enemies are all bullet sponges, no gun feels accurate, enemies come out of nowhere and the lack of a hit indicator means you’ll get into a critical state without realizing why. It looks and sounds terrible and even though it’s only 9 stages long, it feels too long for its own good. The less said about this, the better.
Group 6 (Graphic Style) - Hand Painted
Golf Peaks (Switch)
This sure looks hand painted. From the golf ball that isn’t a perfect circle to the little touches on the terrain, I’m willing to believe it wasn’t done “professionally”.
This is a fun puzzle game despite the title alluding to this being a sport. Put around a ball using cards to determine your strokes and the terrain to manipulate where said ball needs to go. Not overly complicated and there’s a nice balance between easy to solve puzzles and some brain-teasers. A relaxing and enjoyable game overall.
Looking over the rules in the spreadsheet, I just realized that Mode 2 only requires me to pay attention to 10 of the 13 categories and not all of them. Whoops
Based on this criteria, I just completed an Easy level pizza. To celebrate, here’s a pizza song for you all to enjoy:
Not a bad milestone for the first half of the year. Here’s hoping I can get a more difficult pizza going before the year is up. Maybe I can even complete Mode 1 in Casual difficulty while I’m at it.
Group 3 (Title That Contains) - Super/Ultra/Mega or similar
Super Mario Maker 2 (Switch)
Technically you can’t really beat a title like Super Mario Maker 2. However, it has a Story mode and that has both an opening cutscene and an ending cutscene as well as Credits so…
As someone who grew up on the old 8-bit Mario titles, this was fantastic, just like the original Wii U version. I doubt I’ll ever make levels but so long as the people out there make stages, I’ll keep trying and dying in them
Group 7 (Grouvee & Other Databases) - Use Random Trope button
Old School Musical (PC)
Parody is what I got which fits perfectly with this game. After all, it does a crapton of parodies from old games while still fitting it into a rhythm game category. You’ve got parodies of Mega Man, Pokemon, Metal Gear, Metal Slug, and The legend of Zelda to name a few.
It does help that the game itself is a well done rhythm game. The chiptune soundtrack is amazing stuff, even if the tune itself doesn’t fit the game you’re trying to make fun of. It also helps that the game has a false ending of sorts with a bonus that’s equal in length to the main questline. In short, well done title that would also fit in with the Bonus 1 category under Francophone countries.
Bonus Group 1 (Games by Regions/Language) - Australia, New Zealand
Untitled Goose Game (Switch)
A game that’ll remind you of a sleepy English town made by a bunch of people in Australia.
If you’re up on your indies then this has most likely had your attention for a bit. A game about a goose just causing havoc while people are minding their own business. It is damn cute and it certainly lives up to the hype if you’re someone who wants to play something absolutely silly. Yes, it is pretty short even if you do all of the game’s bonus quests but the charm is there and I can certainly see myself playing this all over again from a fresh save. Worth owning for sure.
Bonus Group 2 (Diversity) - LGBT / Queer main character
Sayonara Wild Hearts (tvOS)
Thanks to Apple Arcade, I got my first iOS game in the bag. Played this on the Apple TV so, for clarity, I’m marking this as a tvOS game. Same difference at this point
The older I get, the more I appreciate shorter games. I also appreciate games that give me an experience that transcends and goes for enjoyment instead. That’s what this game really is about. For the most part, you’re really trying to run over hearts for points and occasionally hit a button at the right quicktime event moment in order to pass. The game is very generous with checkpoints and it also happens to be kind enough to ask if you want to skip a section you’re having trouble with. Unless you’re aiming to get all gold rankings on all of the levels and solve the zodiac sign challenges, you can wipe this out in an hour.
None of that matters when the experience is so damn good, though. The art style is awash in neon colors that are more pleasing than garish. The music is amazing and while the levels can be a bit out there, you have to applaud the team for going for style over substance and still making things work for both parties. This is a brilliant title and even though I’ve got the Apple Arcade subscription going, I do want this on my Switch since I know I’ll come back to this often.
Group 3 (Title That Contains) - Signs, for example: &, >, +, !
Dandy & Randy (PC)
Short and sweet. A pseudo 8-bit top down adventure game that’s all about exploration and solving traversal obstacles rather than actually fighting enemies, save for bosses. The game isn’t that difficult and it takes about a little under three hours to not only beat the game on co-op but do so with all of the achievements earned. It’s pretty cheap but recommended.
I will say, the game is certainly easier in co-op since you only need one person to leave the screen in order for both people to leave to the next screen. If you’ve got young kids, this’ll be perfect for them.
Group 8 (Developer/Publisher) - Devolver Digital or 505 Games
Cricket Through The Ages (tvOS)
This doesn’t have much to do with the sport of cricket at all save for the presence of a ball and wicket. In fact, your first few stages is simply you mashing a button and hoping for the best. Eventually, you will play a very simplified version of the game that’s just bowling and hitting before the whole thing becomes silly again.
That’s the real magic as far as the game goes. Get a friend with you and the whole thing devolves into button mashing and hoping for the best but matches go by so quickly that you’ll burn away hours and not even know about it. Beating the game is simply you unlocking every mode possible but that’s quick and there’s no reason not to give this a shot.
Group 6 (Graphic Style) - Pixel Art
The Ninja Saviors: Return of the Warriors (Switch)
A pretty simple side-scrolling beat em up that’s actually quite easy since you’ve got unlimited continues. This is actually a remake of a remake as this is based on the SNES game which itself was based on the arcade game. The big additions here are two new characters if you beat the game’s two difficulties and the presence of co-op, something the SNES game didn’t have. If you’ve got the heart for some simple old school stuff, check it out. Just be aware that you might need help figuring out how to beat the last boss since there’s no indication for how to do that otherwise.
Group 10 (Popular Themes) - Religion or Supernatural
BDSM: Big Drunk Satanic Massacre (PC)
I think this qualifies as being religious or supernatural. After all, you’re in Hell playing the role of Lucifer himself.
The title would indicate that this is a parody game or one with lots of sex references. Both of those things fail as the jokes are tired and for the amount of noise made at the fact that you need a piece of DLC to get to the sex, that part is unsatisfying. It is a competent twin-stick shooter, though, provided you can deal with the lack of interesting weapons and a strategy that doesn’t get any more complicated than circle strafing enemies and dashing every now and then. If you’re a fan of shooters and burned through a glut of them already, then this becomes a “why not” purchase but only if you can find it in a bundle or for very cheap.
Group 1 (Classic Genres) - Science Fiction in Space
Red Siren: Space Defense (Switch)
A tower defense game where your only tower is your lone spaceship. At first, the game seems fine despite being very low budget all around. The graphics look terrible and the character designs are generic but the shooting is fine, at least at first. Once you get through 1/3 of the game, you’ll find the difficulty curve to be steep and since upgrading your ships and weapons does nothing, you’ll opt to just buy the best stuff outright. that requires a mad amount of grinding but at least the best machine gun is good enough to help you plow through a huge chunk of the game before you need to grind again to buy the game’s best ship. Beat that 25th level and the ending will leave you less than satisfied. This is a port of a mobile game and while the Switch version is the better one by far, it becomes difficult to recommend this to anyone considering the very strong shooter library on the system.
Bonus 3 (Life) - To The Future!
Superhot (Xbox One)
You’re playing a VR game using computers barely good enough to run a graphical interface. I’d call that sci-fi
There’s not much else to say about the game that hasn’t already been said. This is one of those brilliant indie titles that no one else seems to have copied yet. The gameplay hooks you in but it is the story that sits with you, especially if you decide to explore the rest of the options from the main menu. Play it if you haven’t already.
