I consider a game played once you click the action button outside the menu.
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For me, if the game is fun i consider it played when i finished the main story / reached credits, etc.
If the game is really fun i consider it played when i reach platinum (mainly playing on ps5, the games i play on switch/pc obviously don’t always have this option).
If the game sucks or i’m not having fun with it, i just put it in played whenever, cause i’m likely never going to play it again anyway.
Making a seperate shelf for games i played but still want to achieve something, like platinum is a good idea though! I might go and do that 
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This is surprisingly common with visual novels, I found out. There is a whole category about them: Multiple Route Mystery. The Somnium files and 999 come to mind, in which getting certain endings is necessary to unlock other routes. I quite like that trope. In the “actual games”, I have seen it in stuff like Beacon Pines and Stories: The Path of Destinies with a similar idea.
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“THE action button”? Only one? Are you playing with one of these babies?
I see games as an art form, that’s why I feel conflicted when I haven’t properly “experienced” what it has to offer. But, at the same time, at this point I can probably tell very precisely if I’m going to enjoy a game or not after the first hour or so. Still, for me is to the credits or bust, whatever means necessary.
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This seems like a good mentality, I think I’m pretty much the same, except if I dislike a game, but I’m a good chunk of the way through (a.k.a. no refunds allowed), I try to push to the end regardless. If the game is at least tolerable, that’s easy, if it’s painful, then I use the same tactics I used when I was a kid, I cheat my way thru lmao
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I agree with you that games are art and like all pieces of art, I think there is no right way to experience them. So “playing” should have a broad definition to consider these different play experiences people can have. That being said, if someone told me they played a game and never made it out of the start menu, I would personally disregard that opinion. There isn’t adequate interaction IMO to be considered “playing”.
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Hats of to you for still pusing those games to the end 
For me, when a game is bad it’s just one look at the backlog and then that game is slinged away, haha 
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When I beat the main story
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